Thursday, October 22, 2015
Chicken Nuggets & Stuff
Upon coming home tonight after a long work day, I found myself thinking about things that I felt guilty about... Now, let me mention that I had an afternoon of parent conferences, an abscessed gum, and very little energy by the time I picked up my son from the sitter. To add to the mix, my hubby is at school tonight for the 3rd consecutive night in a row. (No sympathy needed, just prefacing you with my mood as I was pondering these thoughts.)
Mom guilt is a very real thing. Anything can make for feeling like a failure. Anything.
I started to feel badly that my son was eating Tyson chicken nuggets (for the second time this week) and not some wholesome homemade version that we made together in the kitchen. Then, there was the kitchen... Um... My floor should NOT be that dirty and crumby. Well, I decided to watch a movie with my son, but sheesh- I should be reading to him or making play-doh sculptures or something. My feet just didn't want to stand another minute, though.... Oh yeah- we could have been outside since it was rather mild out. I should have taken him to the park near our house and showed him the importance of exercise.
You see? That list could go on and on. I started to justify those feelings of failure and shortcoming, but after a few minutes, I remembered that I do my best every day. Some days my "best" is better than others. The reality is, we do go to the park, and we read before bed every night, and I do make dinner many nights of the week.
Despite feeling a bit comforted, I needed this real reminder: "My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness." So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me. (2 Corinthians 12:9)
Because of God and His power in me, I understand that I do not live by my own strength. I teach a classroom of 5th grade students by the grace of God. I can support my husband in his ambitious academic endeavors by the grace of God. I can raise a healthy, happy young boy by the grace of God. You see, it never was about me or how I was feeling. I simply cannot do all of these things alone. If all was rosy and picture-perfect in life, I would not have room for God's grace. Life would be too good to let someone else in charge. Sparkling floors, home-cooked meals, & Norman Rockwell moments are wonderful things... But they are things that can leave God out of the equation.
If not for some of my pathetic mommy moments, I would never be able to fully understand the depth of love that Christ has for me. I am one disorganized hot mess on many days. These are the days that I can brag about my strength coming from the real Source.